Category: integration
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What Art Can Teach Us About Grief
Art has been a therapeutic outlet for grieving for me. It always has been. Something I continue to be amazed by is how much I want to control the outcome of my art (much like my life) and how often things go unexpectedly, despite my best efforts. When I focus on controlling the moment and…
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Being Irritable is Completely Normal in Grief
Did you know it’s completely normal to be irritable when you’re coping with grief? Irritability can come from poor sleep patterns, feeling out of control or powerless, feeling frustrated with how your family and friends are responding to your loss, and more. Here are some ways to cope: Irritability is a symptom, not a primary…
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Why Society is Not a Good Example for Processing Grief
I attended the funeral of a high school friend last year and the eulogy was given by a pastor. In his talk, he looked at my friend’s mom and told her she didn’t need to cry anymore- on the day of her son’s funeral as she sat looking at him in his casket. I was…
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Tuesday Thoughts
You’re not responsible for making your grief tolerable to other people. I know- it sounds radical, but how people feel about your grief is not your responsibility to manage. You have enough on your plate just moving through your grief. Don’t add comforting others to the list. You need people around you who can be present…
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Anger is an Indicator Emotion
According to research, when asked, most people describe three primary emotions: happy, sad, and mad. Our dictionary for what we’re feeling is pretty simple when our emotional reality is actually really complex. Because we don’t have a lot of vocabulary for how we’re feeling, anger can seems like a primary feeling. But anger isn’t usually…
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Say Their Names. Tell Their Stories
Saying the names and telling the stories of the people in your life who’ve died is a way you honor the love that remains in your heart for them. So often, we are made to feel uncomfortable in our desire to tell their stories, but speaking of your loved ones is an important part of…
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Grief Always Finds a Way to be Felt
We can try to medicate our grief in a variety of ways, but that only touches the symptoms. Until we open the door to grief and feel the full weight of our loss, it will continue to find open windows to come through in less healthy ways.
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Grief as a series of contractions and expansions
It can be difficult to see the big picture when we’re in grief- one minute we’re doing just fine and in the next, we’re on our knees- metaphorically or literally. It’s easy to wonder if we’re going a little crazy- we may even ask ourselves “why is this happening again?”
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The Difference Between “Getting Over It” and Integration
If you’ve been in grief for longer than a few months, you might have started hearing phrases like, “moving on,” “moving forward,” and “getting over it.” You may also hear things like, “they would want you to be happy” or “they’re free of pain now.” What all of these phrases have in common is the…
Lionheart Grief Coaching 