Lionheart Grief Coaching

“You see this goblet?” asks Ajahn Chah, a Thai meditation master. “For me this glass is already broken. I enjoy it; I drink out of it. It holds my water admirably, sometimes even reflecting the sun in beautiful patterns. If I should tap it, it has a lovely ring to it. But when I put this glass on the shelf and the wind knocks it over or my elbow brushes it off the table and it falls to the ground and shatters, I say, ‘Of course.’ When I understand that the glass is already broken, every moment with it is precious.”

For many of us, our lives are spent in fear of death. Fear of our own death as well as the deaths of the ones we love most. Because we are so often plagued with fear of the future, we often fail to fully live in the present. The irony, of course, is that the present is all that is guaranteed and even that is tenuous.

If we took to heart the wisdom of Ajahn Chah and accepted that we and everyone we love will die, how might our lives be different?

For me, it means I actually have the freedom to choose what I want to spend my time on. Does it really matter what everyone else thinks of my clothes, car, or home if today is the last day I have to live? Do I sacrifice even one hour of my day saying “yes” to something simply because others expect it of me? If today is it, surely the answer to both of those questions is “definitely not.”

Even more important is how I choose to spend my time with the people I cherish: the liberty to let small things go so I can savor the right now as well as the clarity needed to break away from harmful relationships so much more potent. How might our lives be different if, instead of wishing for the next season of life to be upon us, we were fully present in the right now? How might the people we love be more enriched by our presence rather than the anxiety-riddled husk we so often are?

Realizing none of us will make it off this planet alive is a terrifying concept. I won’t deny it. For many of us, death is quite literally our worst fear. Overcoming it, difficult as it sounds, is as easy as accepting reality. You and me, we came from the dust of the universe and to dust we will inevitably return. And once that truth has a chance to settle into the marrow of our souls, we can be free to live the life to which we are truly called.