Lionheart Grief Coaching

When we think about grief, we often think about the death of someone we or someone we know cared for, but did you know a person does not have to die in order to experience grief?

Disenfranchised Grief is defined as “grief that is not usually openly acknowledged, socially accepted, or publicly mourned.”

Because Western culture is largely grief-illiterate, we often don’t acknowledge all our grief or have it acknowledged by the people around us. It can be difficult to name and understand grief that doesn’t include a funeral. 

Here are just some examples of grief that go unnamed and so often, unfelt:

• Divorce
• Infertility
• Estranged Parent(s)/family members
• Unexpected health diagnoses for yourself or loved ones
• Sexual assault
• Foster care
• Adoption
• Loss of Career
• Loss of home/foreclosure
• Loss of country/refugee status
• Life not turning out the way you dreamed

Unfelt/unacknowledged grief that doesn’t involve a death can take just as significant a toll as one that does. These losses can create in us anxiety, depression, questions about our personal value, and potentially lead us into substance abuse. In order to avoid these painful coping strategies, we have to take responsibility for the grief we feel by naming our losses as grief. When we give ourselves permission to process them through actively grieving, we can move through our various emotions with compassion and self-care, replacing self-destructive coping mechanisms with healthy acceptance of our hurt.

What grief might you be carrying that you haven’t acknowledged or named because it doesn’t look like the grief journey of others?